Comic Foundry Rules

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No time to do comic reviews this past week, but I do want to take a moment to praise the awesomeness of Comic Foundry Magazine. Issue #2 came out last week (this time in full colour!) and it is seriously great.

It's like if everything awesome about the comic book community came to life...and then maybe got cursed or something and became a magazine instead of a living thing.
Finally a magazine for smart, funny, cool comic fans!
The cover feature of the new issue is an interview with Matt Fraction...and, hey, putting an actual comic creator on the cover of a magazine instead of a picture of, like, Captain America?...nice one!
Also in this issue...
  • A fashion feature on how to get Jimmy Olsen's look!
  • An interview with Dinosaur Comics' creator Ryan North!
  • All-Star Batman & Robin drinking game!
  • Interview with Kristen Bell!
  • A Venture Bros. Article!
  • Album covers by comic artists!
  • A letter from me!

It's super great. Support this effort by buying at least one copy!

SARLSH, Part 3, By Johnathan

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MAGNETIC KID

There was a point not long before this guide was released that the three charter members of the Legion of Super-Heroes had all semi-retired. Lightning Lad and Saturn girl had gotten married and had a baby (and a Validus!) and Cosmic Boy was... doing stuff. I don't know, maybe he was working on his music or something. In any case, this paved the way for the newly re-electrified Lightning Lass, the somewhat-telepathic Tellus and Magnetic Kid, who was Cosmic boy's little brother, Pol.

Now, Pol had been kicking around Legion continuity for a while. He got blown up pretty good in the late Seventies (by terrorists, I think) and kicked around the Legion Academy for much of the early Eighties, which might provide a clue as to why Cosmic Boy retired all of a sudden: his parents called him up and told him that it was Pol's turn to be a super-hero.

Pol was okay, I guess. He was a bit wide-eyed and inexperienced, which was refreshing, but the group was pretty big while he was on it, and therein lay the problem: when he wasn't saying anything, Magnetic Kid was indistinguishable from Cosmic Boy. It's kind of puzzling, actually. I mean, if I had the same superpowers as my brother (note: I think my brother's powers are headbutt-based) and I joined a group in which my brother had been a charter member and served on for years, I think that I might dress a little differently than him, rather than wearing, oh, the same costume. Seriously Pol - you went so far as to use a different hero name, so why not mix up the outfit a bit, too? A little blue instead of pink, maybe a hat? A vintage pinstripe suit with a horseshoe magnet on the lapel? Hell, if you're ripping off Rokk's costume designs why not kit up in the one with the fishbowl helmet? Kids (nine hundred and seventy-odd years from) today...

Not a bad picture, though. A lot more action than the last few have had, for one thing, and for another, I like the swirly blue magnetism. I also like that Magnetic Kid is using his magnetism to levitate what is patently a stone block. I'm sure that if we were to examine it we'd find a cannon ball lodged in the far side or something, but still.

**SPOILERS FOR THE MAGIC WARS AHEAD (if you care)**

Magnetic Kid also had what was possibly the most pointless Legion death ever. During the Magic Wars (which I found somewhat dreary to begin with) the team tracked the awful evil totally forgettable bad guy to one particular planet (was it the Sorcerer's World? I can't remember. Probably - writers love blowing that place all to hell) only to find that it was encased in a magical shell that could only be opened by the sacrifice of a human life. Magnetic Kid bravely gives his life to open the shield... and it turns out that that was exactly what the evil guy wanted. Further, from what I gathered from reading the rest of the story, he was eventually going to bust out of there himself. So Pol Krinn died so that the Legion could get to the bad guy maybe half an hour earlier. Whee!

For pointless deathery and bad costume decisions, Magnetic Kid is:

NOT APPROVED

Supplement to the Addendum to the Review of the Legion of Super-Heroes (SARLSH), Part Two, By Johnathan

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INVISIBLE KID II


There is a rule that I just came up with: Invisible Kids have lousy costumes. The original, Lyle Norg, had that brown-and-green workout outfit with the headband and all and poor Jaques up there has that yellow-and-black monstrosity. Heck, even the current, totally rebooted and up-to-date and not dead Invisible Kid looks like he just grabbed four or five random things from his closet and called it a costume. It's kind of like they want to be sure that their power will be appreciated every single time that they use it. "Oh, thank Space-God, Jaques. That thing was starting to sear my retinas."

Jaques Foccart got to be the second Invisible Kid basically through random chance. He had come to Legion HQ to get Brainiac 5 to make his sick sister well and then Computo had shown up again and possessed said sister, possibly using nanotechnology. Since Jaques had no powers or anything, Computo just totally ignored him to focus on beating up Legionnaires and in the confusion our pal drank some of the original Invisible Kid's formula (that was just, you know, lying around) and saved the day somehow (it's been a while since I've read the story, okay?). Computer-tyrants take note: underestimate Frenchmen at your peril. Afterward, Jaques joins the team and does okay. Oh, and at one point he starts teleporting as well as turning invisible and ends up in some weird hellscape and finds out that poor Lyle Norg didn't end up boinking some ghost-babe for the rest of time but rather was suffering eternal torment, which was a bit of a bummer.

I like that Invisible Kid II was named Jaques Foccart, because I was an English major and so occasionally read it as Jaques Focault, who would have the combined powers of Jaques Derrida and Michel Foucault, and have a giggle while I imagine him deconstructing the semiotic of the super-hero team (or something like that. I was an English major a while ago). Also, he's from Côte d'Ivoire and as far as I know is the only superhero ever to come from there. Dammit, except for his sister, eventually.

This picture, however... eesh. I kind of hope that it was accidentally released unfinished, because invisibility is really the easiest power to illustrate ever. Just make the outline of his legs dotted instead of solid about halfway down and then ask the colourist to fade out the yellow at about that point. Ta-da! You did it! Alternate method: leave the whole panel blank. As it stands, this is just terrible as a showcase for the character. I mean, when Superman has a shot where he's just standing there with his arms folded, he's at least hovering a foot or so off the ground, right? Take some notes, Jaques.

Invisible Kid II had two modes: brooding and surprised. In the first, he thought a lot about how his sister was sick (she was in a tube for a couple of years before Brainiac fixed her) and how invisibility was a lame power, which showed that he didn't think about the implications of having superpowers so much as read old Maxim articles about lame super-heroes. Don't listen to them, man! Sure you can't fly through the sun, but the sun's boring. You can fly through, say, the changing rooms of the stars. Plus, you can punch villains on the back of the head, which I for one have always wanted to do to Universo. In the other mode, Jaques shocased the fact that he wasn't a super-scientist or an adventurer or something, just some guy who had drank some goop. Every time that Validus or Darkseid or whoever would show up he would jump about a foot and shout "WTF!" Okay, he would shout "Sacre coeur!" but the spirit of the thing was the same. For me, it never got boring.

And that's pretty much that, Invisible Kid II-wise. Except to note that of all of the bad hairdos, post Five Year Gap, his was the worst. Still, on the balance:

JOHN APPROVED

Supplement to the Addendum to the Review of the Legion of Super-Heroes, Part One, By Johnathan

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Ahaha! Time to review alla the Legionnaires that I haven't yet gotten around to! Uh, pre-Five Year Gap, of course. We'll leave that can of worms for a later date.

BLOK

I like Blok. I'm kind of sad to learn that he has no name, though. Silly me, thinking that it was Blok, all this time.

Blok was from the planet Dryad, which had at some point exploded. The Legion was on hand to evacuate, and for some reason a group of Dryadan youngsters assumed that since the Legion was there that they were the ones who blew the place up and so they swore eternal vengeance, got powers from a jerk named the Dark Man and started calling themselves the League of Super Assassins (and just to be on the safe side, they also swore vengeance against grass, because the whole damn planet was covered in it, as well as the sun, for just floating there and watching the place blow up). As so frequently happens, they almost killed the entire Legion on their first try but afterward never quite managed to pull it together again.

The only Super-Assassin to go anywhere other than a seat next to Ronn Karr at the Legion of Super-Villains annual benefit dinner was Blok, who had never been that struck on killing people anyway. He ended up with a light jail term because he'd helped to capture the rest of his team and tried out for Legion membership once he got out of the clink (and he completely schooled Lamprey, Nightwind and Crystal Kid while doing it, which makes me happy). Blok made a really neat Legionnaire and a great requisite Big Strong Team Member. He started out fairly clueless about how human society worked (oh yeah: he's not a human made of rock, he's an alien. Made of rock) and unlike a lot of similar characters never quite lost that trait, which was charming. He spent a lot of time watching the Legion mission logs and palling around with the White Witch and being philosophical and introspective - not quite as unusual today for a Big Strong Tough Guy but definitely a refreshing variation on the type.

As you can see, Blok liked to wear his pants hiked up real high, which I would hate except for the fact that it's so distinctive that I like it for its uniqueness. I just wish he'd wear some sort of solid colour instead of horrible stripes alla the time. Ah, well. at least this picture showcases big shoulder pads in their optimal environment - on someone with big shoulders - rather than in a less-than-suitable one, such as everywhere else that big shoulder pads have been used as a costume element, ever.

This is also a decent shape for Blok. By which I mean that he looks a lot less hideous than he frequently did back then. See, back in the old days, Blok kept getting redesigned - first he was kind of tall with a horrible neck-frill kind of thing, then he was squat with no nose, then he had these kind of erupting craters on his shoulders... I think that they eventually said that it was some sort of mutation based on environmental conditions or something but I'm thinking it was just a series of artists who hated drawing him the old way, or felt like messing with the rock guy, or whatever. The only good redesign wasn't really one, it was just this one time that Blok got all shot up and the scars and craters stayed with him for literally years. It was very very cool, in that a character's physical state is usually pretty resistant to change. Even though Batman or whoever has a broken leg and comic book time passes at about the rate of a month a year, he'll be fully recovered by next issue.

Evidently, I like Blok enough that I don't have anything particularly funny to say about him (the picture doesn't help - he should be standing there holding a train over his head or something. All this picture says is "I'm large and I like to accessorize with yellow"). I was sad when he eventually fell victim to the great purge of post-1975 (or so) characters that eventually swept through Legion comics. Booo! bring back Blok, because he is:

JOHN APPROVED

This Week's Haul: BBQ at Blue Beetle's House!

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Daredevil #106

In this issue Daredevil throws a party! And all of his friends are there and they all have a wonderful time! Daredevil laughs and loves and dances and decides everything is going to be ok from now on.

Oh, I'm kidding. In this issue Daredevil continues to march in the endless parade of shit that is his life.

I love this series. Really love it. But, damn, it has to lighten up a little. Comic books shouldn't make you wish they came with a suicide pill.

Blue Beetle #25

People sometimes ask me why I read comic books. This comic book right here is EXACTLY why I read comic books. What an awesome and fun issue of an awesome and fun series. It brings together the whole supporting cast in a way that makes you say "Hey, this comic has a really excellent supporting cast."

And, ladies and gentlemen, I give you your new desktop image:

Plus, I love any comic that ends in a super hero BBQ party:

All-Star Superman #10

I want to read this at least three more times because there is just too much awesome happening here to take in all in one sitting.

This issue was particularly heartwarming. And confusing. But when you read it really carefully it's staggeringly brilliant. Superman created our Earth! Insane!

And this page is amazing:

Wolverine First Class #1

This was great! It was more like Kitty Pryde First Class, which is ok with me. I can typically take or leave Wolverine, but team him up with a plucky young girl and you've got a recipe for adorable!

The art is excellent. The story is really fun, and, along with X-Men First Class, it doubles my cute X-men story intake!

X-Men First Class #10

A Cyclops-centric story, which is ok with me because I inexplicably really like Cyclops. He gets sent on a solo mission after the rest of the team all hilariously have a horrible bacterial stomach infection.

Green Lantern #29

Here's the thing: we've all read Hal Jordan's origin a thousand times. But does it ever really get tired? I really liked this issue a lot, and am looking forward to more of Geoff Johns' version of this tale. Especially since Ivan Reis is laying down some absolutely beautiful art to compliment it.

This is a pretty smart move by DC to re-tell the origin because of the sudden crazy interest in all things Green Lantern, thanks to the Sinestro Corps War. I like it when comic publishers do smart things.

Batman Confidential #15

I hope everyone has been reading this Bedard/Morales run on Batman Confidential. I understand if people have been missing it, due to the fact that BC has been a festering dung heap since it started. No more! Now it is one of the best Batman stories that I have read in a very long time. Do check it out. This issue was part 3 of 4.

Teen Titans #57

I am really close to dropping this, and it is 99% related to the art.

I just want to offer this bit of advice to current comic artists: belly shirts. No one wears them anymore, guys. You put a girl in a belly shirt and it looks like Melrose Place. Please take an hour or so a week to take note of current fashions. These are teenagers; they should look somewhat hip and "with it" (as the kids say).

Also...that is not how clothing fits. I know I shouldn't even open this can of worms because it's so enormous, but shirts don't perfectly encase breasts like that. There is stretching and hanging and extra material. This looks effing ridiculous.

Plus, she's a teenager, so...gross.