This Week's Haul: So Very Late

Once again, these reviews are ridiculously late. I have my stupid financial accounting exam tomorrow night, and then I'm free until January 7th! Sweeeeet!

Countdown Week 21
Trickster is still dead and Piper is still sad. So am I.

Countdown: Arena #1

And the Lord sayeth to Monarch "Build an arena 300 cubits by 300 cubits, and bring into the arena three of every superhero. Preferably you will choose the most ridiculous of each superhero. And make them fight to the death, for I am bored."

This, folks, is the definition of entertainment for the lowest common denominator.

I don't even know what to say about it. It's ridiculous and bad and I really, really don't understand why this "event" is happening.

Justice League of America #15

I am so close to dropping this, and that is just wrong. I'm a big JLA fan. I'm a big McDuffie fan. So why does this suck? I dunno, but it does.

It's just generally not fun or interesting. And it's full of really awkward jokes.

And also, who's drawing this thing? Sisqo?

Thong-thong-thong-thong-thong.

Canary's got dumps like a truck!

The All-New Atom #18

Ah! Now here's the best JLA-related story I've read in awhile! And the best Wonder Woman story I've read in awhile!

I actually totally adored this issue. I loved every panel. Like this one:

And this one:

And also The Atom being burned alive on a Ted Grant (snicker) Indoor Grill! And Wonder Woman licking her thumb and rubbing the blood off the Atom's head! So good.

But please don't let The Head be dead!

Avengers The Initiative Annual #1

Awesome! Not only is this everything I hope for when I pick up an annual, it's the first comic to move the Skrull storyline along in awhile. Everything interesting that is happening in the Marvel universe is happening in this series (and in the ones that Brubaker writes, of course, but those are, like, their own universe. An awesome universe).

Everyone is talking about Skrulls over in The New Avengers, but in The Initiative we're seeing some honest-to-God Skrulls. And some great back stories for all the main characters.

World War Hulk: Aftersmash

Hulk smashed. New York is a mess. Iron Man is an insufferable prick.

The most awesome thing about this comic is the Mini Marvels comic at the back.

So, so good. Marvel needs to put these into every comic. And release a book that collects them.

Please note Daredevil in the upper right corner of this panel:

I did a spit-take.

Jonah Hex #26

Man. This was messed up. I read this right before bed and I had a bad case of the jeeblies. This story is probably going to stay with me for awhile.

It was really awesome, though. And the art was fantastic!

Robin #169

Beautiful art! Lame tie-in! I mean, seriously, how many times have I heard this story?

Totally Evil Guy: "I can bring your loved ones back from the dead, all you have to do is whatever crazy thing I say!"

Noble Hero: "Really?"

Totally Evil Guy: "Yup. For reals."

Usually Very Intelligent Hero: "Well...alright then."

Other Hero(es) Present: "You probably shouldn't listen to that guy. He's evil."

Disappointing Hero: "DON'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO! WHY SHOULD I BE ALLOWED TO LIVE WHEN MY PARENTS/SISTER/GIRLFRIEND/SIDEKICK/BROTHER/BEST FRIEND/UNCLE BEN IS DEAD?!"

Other Hero(es): "Yeah, that sucks...but the thing is, you're probably just going to die, and then the evil guy won't actually bring back your loved ones. I mean, why would he?"

Dumb Hero: "Screw you! I'm doing it!"

Comic: TO BE CONTINUED!

Really, Tim. I expected better from you.

Now, the most important thing to come out this week, of course, is the Saga of the Super Sons trade paperback. It is, hands down, the campiest thing you can own. It's just brilliantly terrible, and everyone should own it. My love/hate relationship for the Super Sons knows no bounds.

This Week's Haul: One More Day? More like: This comic costs "One More Dollar"

Here's some whirlwind comic reviews comin' at ya!

The Sensational Spider-Man #41

Spidey. Hear me out.

Aunt May is very old. And her husband is dead. I just want you to consider that before you do anything crazy like trade your life as you know it for hers. I know you love her. We all do. But seriously, she is, like, what? 150 years old now? She probably wants to die. And she certainly doesn't want you throwing your life away so she can live the last six months or whatever of hers.
Also, incidentally, your comic books suck.

Sub-Mariner #6

You know what was surprisingly awesome? This mini-series. Particularly this issue. If you missed out, I think it's going to make an excellent little TPB, so watch for it.

This was actually the first comic in a long time that I was so into while I was reading it that I actually got pissed off at the ads. I'd turn the page after an awesome cliffhanger panel and be like "What?! Ad?! Get out of here!" It was a very gripping issue with a great ending.

I'd like to mention this about Marvel: I like what they do with their comics in terms of extra stuff. I like having that front page that summarizes the story up to this point. I like those new pages at the back with a Q&A, and some fun facts about characters, and some other stuff. I'm into it. Fix up, DC.

X-Men First Class #6

Holy lord. What a mess! I mean, the story is as great as always, but it was completely out of order. And that confused me for an embarrassingly long time before I figured out the problem. I assume that Marvel is going to send out corrected issues.

Right, Marvel?

Daredevil #102

It seems like Daredevil comes out every week now. But I am certainly not complaining.

Poor Matt Murdock. Proof that bad things happen to good/borderline psychotic/actually not that good people. This latest helping of sweet, sweet schadenfreude has Milla returning home to Matt, but under 24-hour house arrest surveillance. Matt's happy she's home, but we all know he has no reason to be because something awful is definitely going to happen to her, or him, or both of them very soon.

You know what I'd like? An issue of Daredevil where he wakes up, has a big delicious breakfast, takes a relaxing stroll in the park with a wife who is in no way crazy or sad, and then maybe takes the night off and goes dancing. And maybe eats cake in there somewhere. That guy is in desperate need of a really good day.

Of course, then we wouldn't get to see awesome fights like this:

Batman and the Outsiders #2

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...huh? Whu? Oh right. This is why I always have, and always will, hate The Outsiders.

Awesome! Catwoman and Martian Manhunter are going to be in it! I love those guys...oh, wait. They're leaving forever. And here's that dumb Batgirl I have no time for. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

Batman #671

So much talent being wasted on a stupid crossover.

However, the fight between Batman and whatshisface was great. I don't know if I've ever seen Batman's eye shields get smashed up like that. It looked cool.

Also...Batman ended up coming back and winning this fight. Because he is awesome.

Blue Beetle #21

Nice fill-in! This was really enjoyable. The more Traci Thirteen the better, I say!

All-Star Batman and Robin #7

Making fun of this isn't even fun anymore. It just makes fun of itself so effectively that there is no joy in it.

I mean, the cover is The Joker sporting a giant back piece for no reason. In the very first panel Gotham City is called a "whore." Dick makes yet another homophobic remark about Batman being queer. Batman says/does some more things that make it clear that he should not be allowed within five states of a child.

And Green Lantern is an idiot man-child. Usually that would be funny, but it really is just obnoxious here.

I hate this comic. I hate it so much.

Countdown #22

This issue had a perfect example of what's wrong with this series. Mister Miracle shows up to help Jimmy Olsen. He's wearing his old costume, and seems unconcerned that at this very moment he is on a mission with Superman to Apokolips. Why can't this damn comic sync up even slightly to what's happening in the other comics?

Know what else I hated? Trickster dying. And I can't really see a way out of this death. He was shot in the head and the heart. He's fairly dead. And this little scene was heartbreaking:

Nooooooo!!! They were just starting to like each other! I hate you, comics.

Green Lantern Corps #18

This whole issue was one big fight between Superman Prime and the new Ion, Sodam Yat.

Superman Prime continues to be delightfully bratty:

"Read 'em and weep!" I really love how hard Prime tries with the smack talk, but he really just sounds like a giant tool.

I really liked Sodam Yat's back story too.

Superman Annual # 13

Camelot Falls (or should I say Camelot Stalls...zing!) finally gets wrapped up in this annual. Good lord, how long has this story been going on? I know I really enjoyed many issues of it, but it just seems so long ago. We're lucky enough to have three great Superman stories happening in three separate series simultaneously...but they are all moving slower than molasses.

I prefer an annual that stands on its own and is fun with lots of mini stories, but this was fine. The back-up, with lovely art by Renato Guedes, was really cute. I liked the premise of Supergirl trying to cook everyone a traditional Kryptonian meal.

Gotham Underground #2

Sometimes you just want to read a Batman comic that isn't about the resurrection of Ra's al Ghul in anyway. Thank God for Gotham Underground, the totally entertaining criminal-centric 12-part Batman series for the rest of us. If it keeps up the good work, this is going to be my favourite current Batman title.

So close to being done school for four weeks, guys. And when I'm done, I am going to read every comic ever and write about them. I thank you for your patience. As always, I wanna hear what you all thought of this week's comics, including any that I didn't post about. Because chances are good that I read them.

This Week's Haul: So Late It's Pretty Much Irrelevant

As I said, the comics were late this week after the long weekend. And I've been really busy. But now, without further ado...This Week's Haul!

Booster Gold #3

Thanksgiving can go to hell if it means I have to wait even one extra day for the new issue of Booster Gold. This comic is my favourite...thing. It's like...what if Quantum Leap was AWESOME?!

And in this issue he runs into Jonah Hex!!! This issue was basically a parade of things I love. It's like this comic reads my mind. Before we even get to the cowboy fun there's a Back to the Future reference (you know that both Booster Gold and Rip Hunter have seen that movie, like, so many times) and this Smallville reference:

If Booster Gold doesn't save the day, the world turns into Smallville! (Only...better Smallville...with Clark and Lex raised together as brothers. That rules). It's so weird and rad to see my boy Lionel in a comic. Nice.

Now let's get to the good stuff. Like Booster dressing like a cowboy:

Oh man, Skeets is totally welcome to follow me around blasting The Ecstasy of Gold if he wants. That would add a touch of majesty to everything I do (like, when I'm frantically running around cemeteries...).

I'm getting off track. What I meant to talk about was Booster stripping down there (yowza!) and also that Rip Hunter keeps a cheap cowboy Halloween costume in the Time Sphere.

So our boy runs into Jonah Hex, as I said, and is challenged to a drinking competition. So Booster gets PLOWED. And it's great.

But not as great as SKEETS RIDING A HORSE!

Let's see another shot of that:

Adorable!

And then there was this:

Booster is gonna drive the Time Sphere...drunk.

This is as good as comics...nay...entertainment...gets.

Black Adam #3

This series is really, really good. I am calling this the surprise of the year. I really wasn't even planning on reading this, but every issue is great.

In this one, Black Adam runs into Hawkman and totally throws down. It's AWESOME.

Also, Doug Mahnke draws a great looking Hawkman. The helmet is perfect.

Adam totally lays waste to him. He crushes his mace with one hand, rips one of his wings off and smashes him mask up.

This next page is great:

Soooo rad.

Captain Carrot and the Final Ark #1

This is pretty much as geeky as something can possibly be. And I love it.

"Justa Lotta Animals"!!! Quail Simone! Giraffe Johns! Panda Dio!

If you're confused about Captain Carrot, don't be. It's just fun. It's an Earth that mirrors our own but its inhabitants are anthropomorphic animals. Funny ones.

I laughed out loud quite a bit. Particularly at these two panels:

And this one, which reveals that the past few pages of monologue-style narration have actually been a very long one-sided conversation Rodney Rabbit is having with the worm in his tequila bottle:

It's extra funny because the worm is wearing an iPod for no apparent reason.

Countdown Week 29

I really only have one comment on this week's issue, and that is this:

I know that they are hand-cuffed together and it would therefore be tricky and everything, but...wouldn't Piper and Trickster maybe want to think about changing their clothes? Since they are on the run and stuff? I mean, I would at least try. If I were them.

Green Arrow/Black Canary #1

I actually did expect to see this team-up...because this cover was revealed months ago. Which is weird because there is a perfectly good variant cover with Canary and Oliver that DC could have released in Previews instead.

Let's talk about Cliff Chiang and how frigging awesome his art is. It's so beautiful. I could not be happier with the choice of artist on this.

And look at classic Oliver, looking all sexy:

I really enjoyed this. I'm a big Connor fan, so it's nice to see him getting some attention. And Black Canary's insistence that the man she killed wasn't really her husband is very touching. And of course the only one who believes her is my boy Batman:

Awwwwww.

When you hug Batman, he gets so freaked out that little red triangles appear above his head.

Yeah, so Batman believes that Oliver isn't really dead. Hal on the other hand is totally keen to bury the body and move on. Because Hal's an idiot. Or Hal wants Oliver's XBox or something.

This autopsy scene was pretty amusing:

It actually isn't almost exactly what they do. What they do is a pretty standard, and tidy, autopsy that leaves the body in tact. So I don't know what Midnight is going on about. I guess he gets his giggles where he can. Or Judd Winick does. Either way, I like Batman in that apron.

Y'know what else I really liked in this comic? Dinah's eye make-up. That mauve shadow really looks pretty!

So of course Ollie isn't dead. But I guess Everyman is.

Green Lantern #24

Super awesome as always.

Particular highlights this time around include the continued use of lethal force by the GL Corps (I could watch those guys waste bad guys all day), and Parallax calling Kyle "the pretty boy."

This page is awesome:

Superboy Prime is kind of awesome. "I'm baaaaack. Jerks."

I really like that aside with Superman and Hank too.

I also really like later in this issue when Kyle emerges from Parallax, all naked, and Guy uses his ring to make clothes for him...but he only makes tight-fitting boxer shorts...

Justice League Unlimited #38

Giganta loves Wally!

Did anyone else find this comic to be kinda hard to read? I hate to say that about a kids comic, because it makes me feel dumb, but the pacing of the story just seemed sorta bizarre. It was like every other page was missing or something.

But I'll tell you what I loved about it: Giganta using a skyscraper as a make-up mirror:

And this:

Another Smallville reference! What a week!

Runaways #28

First of all, I just want to say that the zombie variant cover for this was horrible. All of the zombie covers are horrible, but this one especially. The main cover, on the other hand, was beautiful. As you can see.

This was a good issue. I just don't really have anything to say about it. Except I hope they return to the present soon because I am getting bored of the past.

Superman #668

And we're off on another zany Busiek adventure. This time Superman is searching for the supposed Third Kryptonian on Earth (besides Power Girl, Krypto, and his new son Christopher...who seems to be the most neglected son in the whole world, because he has not really made much of an impact on Superman's life. I keep forgetting about the little tyke).

To find the Kryptonian, Supes gets some help from his old pal Batman. Because that guy loves to find stuff. Superman also brings Christopher to the cave, and it's pretty cute:

It's been awhile since I've read a good Superman/Batman sexual tension comic, so I enjoyed this. Maybe this will be the arc where they finally kiss.

Why?

Awww, Batman can't say 'no' to those eyes.

Also, I don't know who this guy is, but I like his enthusiasm:

Suicide Squad #2

This series is also awesome.

For one thing: Dinosaurs!

Getting shot in the face!!!

I would like to know where I can get one of these fire swords:

Man, that's sweet. I could just slice and BBQ a cow right there on the spot. No more pesky waiting for grilled meat.

Wonder Woman #13

J. Torres does double Wonder Duty this week with Wonder Woman and Wonder Girl. And he does a good job of both.

The art on this kinda jumped around between pretty good and really bad. Like, why did Wonder Girl look like a 40-year-old trophy wife?

And Wonder Woman's shorts were certainly awful in this issue:

And Black Canary's were possibly worse:

Wow.

Wonder Girl #2

Well, this is a much better Wonder Girl than the one we saw above.

Wonder Girl is a very charming mini-series. The fun art really suits Torres' writing, I think.

In this issue Cassie is getting stalked by a very persistent Hercules. He gives her a new outfit, which looks pretty cool:

Man, I am so sleepy. I can't think of anything else to say about anything. Comics were good this week. Yay!

This Week's Haul: Rush Job

I gotta do this week's reviews in a hurry because I am studying for my mid-terms. Sorry in advance for the lack in quality.

Action Comics #856

We need more comics that open with a little girl being pushed off a balcony:

More Bizarro awesomeness from Eric Powell, Geoff Johns and Richard Donner.

Bizarro Lois and Jimmy:

Bizarro Mxy:

Bizarro Doomsday:

I also really liked Bizarro Lex Luthor because I picture him talking the same, sounding all dignified and smart, but with the Bizarro-style mixed-up words.

As with the last issue, the Powell art is amazing. There was so much cool stuff on this page alone:

Powell makes Superman's eye blasts look extra crazy. And that panel of Supes getting punch by four fists at once is pretty awesome. As is the one below it. Pa Kent's POV there is pretty nuts.

I can't wait to see more of the Bizarro Justice League in the next issue. The last page in this one cracked me up.

The All New Atom #16

The awesome thing about this issue is that Roger Stern was filling in for Gail Simone, and he did such a great job that I didn't even notice. It's nice to know that, if Simone ever had to abandon Ryan Choi, it's possible that someone else could write him just as well.

Ok, so this was great. Laugh-out-loud funny as usual.

The other nice thing about this issue is that, for reasons I can only attribute to perhaps an increased interest in the title since the search for Ray Palmer began, it brings the reader up to speed on everything that happened previously. But it's done throughout the comic in a way that isn't boring. I can see being confused if you picked up an issue of The Atom as to why Ryan lives with a giant, floating alien head.

Anyway, great issue. Great series.

Green Lantern Corps #16

Planet Fight!!!!!!!

Hells yeah!

Also, the guardians have decided that it's alright for the lanterns to get their kill on:

Our heroes waste no time. They just start laying waste to the Sinestro Corps immediately:

So the tide has turned in the epic space battle. And it's heading to Earth. Which we knew already from the last Green Lantern issue, but still...it's gonna be dope!

I really liked Sodam Yat's battle-ravaged look:

He could totally patch that suit up with his ring. He chooses not to.

Countdown Week 30

I liked this issue. I think this series might be getting better. Maybe. It still has thirty issues in which it can become awesome. Right now it's pretty good...most of the time.

There was a lot of Piper/Trickster stuff in this one, which I always appreciate. And our Ray Palmer-searchers landed on an Earth where Jason Todd is Batman and the Atom is a chick and Donna Troy is Wonder Woman and Kyle is...Kyle. I couldn't really tell them apart.

"We don't know these people, Donna, stop handing out personal information." Can anyone else tell what is wrong with that sentence?

Hehe..."Happy fun-time Batman." Oh, I really hope they find that Earth.

Countdown Presents The Search for Ray Palmer: Crime Society #1

So I guess it is possible for this crazy idea for a series to be good...you just have to get Sean McKeever to write it.

This was really enjoyable. So much better than that Wildstorm one that was out a few weeks ago. The whole comic is a really entertaining life story of the Jokester, who we met in last week's Countdown and who is now following Team Palmer around. I highly recommend.

Detective Comics #837

Not a lot of Batman in this one, but that's cool. It was a really good fill-in-the-blanks issue that explained how Harley found her way to the Amazonian women's shelter in Metropolis. Plus, Bruce Wayne hires The Riddler, who you'll recall is on the straight and narrow now and working as a private detective, to recover some stolen goods. This leads to Riddler teaming up with Harley because the thief is also at the shelter.

It's fun.

JLA/Hitman #2

This was awesome.

For one thing, I love how much Batman hates Tommy:

And I love how much Tommy loves making Batman angry.

I also love a powerless Kyle having to take a guy out with a chair:

Yes, it's all very awesome and hilarious.

But here's the twist...this comic is really very touching. It basically serves as a love letter Ennis is writing for his late character, Tommy Monaghan. And the letter is narrated by Superman, who is telling the story to a reporter. And it gets do damn sad, you wouldn't believe it. This two-part series is really great. I never expected this kind of love to be put into an Ennis comic. Particularly not a JLA comic. I'm impressed.

Metal Men #3

I'm not going to pretend to always understand what's going on in this comic, but I definitely love looking at it.

I mean, I do get what's going on. There's just so much...science.

But it's a very fun read and Magnus is adorably nerdy and every single panel is stunning:

Just look at the perfection that is this page:

The lighting and shadowing in this comic is really fantastic. Look at that panel with the flashlight!

I love Magnus practicing his marriage proposal, and trying to not bring science into it.

Supergirl #22

Hands down, the best issue of Supergirl yet. She kicked so much ass and was so cool.

And at the end she totally stands up to Superman and tells him that she can live her own life and she doesn't need him playing father figure all the time. Superman surprises her by agreeing with her.

And then the Teen Titans surprise me by walking out of that barn, where I guess they have been hiding. Which is really weird. And great.

That's the end of the Bedard/Guedes run, sadly. It kinda feels like it should be the end of the series, but they are going to keep going with it. I am curious to see where they take it. The next run sounds kind of inspired by her appearances in the Brave and the Bold, at least in terms of her taking part in some inter-galactic missions which involve JLA members. We'll see...

Blah. Alright, that's all I have time for. Back to statistics.

This Week's Haul: Blargh!

Man, there was so much throwing-up in my comics this week. Like, really. A lot. It was weird.

Also, I read a lot of stuff this week, so I'm going to run through everything pretty quickly. I'll just say that Avengers: The Initiative was really good. Sub-Mariner was good too. And Blue Beetle.

And now, the rest.

52 Aftermath: The Four Horsemen #2

Is it insane that this is kinda my favourite thing that I read this week? I really, really liked it.

As I mentioned with the first issue of this series, there is some really great Superman/Batman banter happening here. I wish the story arcs in Superman/Batman were half this good. It's just really entertaining reading.

Wonder Woman shows up to complete the trinity in this issue. And she totally holds her own in the snappy banter arena:

Speaking of 'snappy,' the guy we all love to hate, Snapper Carr, shows up at the end of this. I have no idea what's going to happen with that.

I totally thought Batman was holding a flask there in that last panel, but it's just his binoculars.

I dunno...good story, good writing, good art. That makes for a pretty solid comic. I mean, there are still four issues left in which the whole thing could go to hell, but I'm impressed so far.

There was no puking in this comic, but it kinda looked like Superman was gonna hurl. Pestilence is a bitch.

Countdown to Adventure #2

If you want to sell a lot of copies of this comic, maybe don't put Forerunner on the cover. Animal Man, Animal Man, Animal Man. Front and centre.

That's pretty much all I have to say about this. Except that the Adam Strange stuff is the best part.

Countdown Week 31

Add points to this week's Countdown because it was a McKeever issue. Subtract points due to lack of Piper and Trickster.

Also, Jason Todd almost gets wasted by Owl Man.

Would anyone have cared? Anyone?

X-Men First Class #4

How much do I love this comic? SO MUCH!

For one thing, it really fills the Spider-Man Loves Mary-Jane void. And for another, it is just such a great idea and I am really glad that Marvel has continued it into this second series. It's such a sunny comic in the middle of all the gloom. And I also really like that it's all-ages appropriate, but written for an adult readership. So it's running on the assumption that adult comic books fans want to read something cute and fun from time to time.

So in this issue, Iceman and Beast take a road trip!

And it's a totally awesome road trip. Look at the places they go!:

I love that Miami panel.

Ok, and look at how adorable this page is (the set-up: it's the end of the trip, our heroes just saved a bunch of people during a hurricane in the Florida Keys, and now they are waiting out the storm in the car under a dome of ice that Bobby made):

Awwwwwwww. Seriously! So cute!

Jeff Parker rules, and the art, by Julia Bax, was really, really fantastic. I was in love with every panel. Awesome all around.

Iron Fist #9/Iron Fist Annual #1

Double shot of Iron Fist this week!

If ever a sumo warrior traps you with his magic lightning lasso, this is what you should do:

Owned!

But you can't get cocky, cause otherwise this will happen:

Fortunately for me, I had good money riding on Fat Cobra.

Green Arrow Year One #5

*sigh* What's the point anymore? Now that I know that we all know that he's dead. I think that enough time has gone by that I can drop that week-old spoiler. Dude! Oliver totally got killed on his wedding night by one of his own arrows! Through the neck!

As a Connor Hawke fan, I'm not entirely sad about this development. But I feel bad for Hal and Roy. Those guys are gonna be miserable. And Mia. I love Mia.

But I should really talk about this comic. Because it's really good. And it totally has made me see the sex appeal of Oliver Queen, which was previously a bit of a mystery to me. I know that DC is planning more Year One series (isn't there a Huntress one or something crazy?). I hope they are all as good as this one.

Superman Confidential #6

Hey, remember how the Batman Confidential franchise was totally sucking while Superman Confidential was totally good? Well, DC is putting a fast stop to that! And I guess we have to wait to see how the Darwyn Cooke/Tim Sale storyline ends. In the meantime we get this total garbage.

Oh, please.

Now, first of all, I was excited that Palmiotti and Gray were writing the next Superman Confidential arc. And I was also excited that it would involve Lori Lemaris. But then I saw that Koi Turnbull would be doing the art, and, well...bad art can ruin a comic book.

I tried to ignore the art while reading this and focus on the story, but I just couldn't. It was so distracting.

I think with different art, this would be a completely different comic. The story has a Silver Age imaginary story charm to it. Everyone is a mermaid/man except Superman...Lois, Jimmy, Lex...and Superman is being mind controlled by Lori. Which kinda sucks, because I have a fondness for that mermaid.

Actually, the story is kinda dark and shitty. And it bothers me that Aquaman, a perfectly excellent underwater adventure comic, was just canceled and now this hits the shelves.

Anyway...Yuck:

And yuck:

Yargh. So unnecessary.

Pretty terrible. What do you think, Superman?

My thoughts exactly.

Teen Titans #51

Yep, I think this McKeever-writing-Teen Titans thing is gonna work out just fine.

It's off to a helluva start. The Teen Titans are visited by future versions of themselves, who are now a super hero team called The Titans. Tim Drake is Batman, Cassie is Wonder Woman, etc. Plus, Bart and Conner are back thanks to Tim's cloning efforts. They are all pretty evil, and the teens aren't impressed.

Future versions of super heroes are always fun because they reveal little pieces of what's to come.

Pity for Tim? But Tim is awesome! He's worth, like, ten Conners!

Also, I think this might be a Marvel dig:

I'm going to pretend it is. It's nice that Supergirl and I agree on something.

Yeah, so, excellent comic. I'm adding it to my pull list. Sean McKeever has a real gift for writing teenagers and I don't want to miss any of it. Plus I'm really liking the line-up, and it gives me some bonus Blue Beetle.

Justice League of America #13

I certainly don't need to be convinced that Dwayne McDuffie is the right man for writing JLA. Plus, the Wedding Special was awesome. So I was really excited about this issue.

Shame about the art. Damn shame.

It just looked so incredibly 90s. I dunno. Maybe that's what they're aiming for, but it's not what I'd aim for.

Behold Killer Frost:

And John Stewart:

Pages like this make me want to load Pearl Jam's Ten into my Sony Sports Walkman and set the VCR to tape Lois & Clark. Like, what the hell?

Also...I don't think the writing was that good! Like, it was all messed up and confusing and ignored chunks of continuity and stuff.

I basically liked two pages. This one:

And this one:

The second one I liked because for once it's Superman, and not Batman, who figured something out. Although, I guess it's possible that Batman told him.

Colour me disappointed.

The Spirit #10

Man I love that cover.

Ok, I lied earlier. This was actually my favourite thing that I read this week.

In this issue The Spirit is solving a murder mystery that involves the deaths of many cable TV talking heads. They are all based on actual television personalities, including Rosie O'Donnell, Rush Limbaugh, Bill O'Reilly and Stephen Colbert. It's all very clever and funny. Check out our hero as he's caught in the clutches of "Ann Coulter":

Oh, snap!

I was particularly impressed with the pages parodying the Colbert Report. Satire of a satire is a tricky thing, and it's done really well.

Also, I think it's an interesting coincidence that this issue opens with a gag that commentates on fill-in comics the same week that the final issue of Cooke's Superman Confidential run got bumped. I mean, not bumped like I think it's finished and DC just won't release it, but in the way that at least one of the creators hasn't been able to finish it yet and thus DC has chosen to start the next arc rather than wait for the end of this one. (Tim Sale, j'accuse!).

*sigh* I can't believe this run is almost over.

Batman #669

Yup, this was pretty much perfect.

I loved this page. So much:

This is gonna make an excellent-looking trade.

I don't really have anything else to say. It was awesome.

Wonder Woman Annual #1

Hey, remember this storyline? Barely? It was so long ago that I actually forgot that it never got finished. Well, here's our ending...and it's really good.

I forget most of the details of the original story on the Heinberg/Dodson run, but I do know that I liked it. And this Annual made me remember why. Heinberg just writes a really fantastic Wonder Woman. And it's a shame that this story couldn't have finished on schedule because this issue gives us a really great plot development that probably would have helped with the Picoult storyline a lot.

Basically, it ends with Circe working some magic that makes Diana a human unless she changes into Wonder Woman. So, as Diana Prince, she is vulnerable and without her powers (at least, I assume no powers...certainly she can get hurt). I think that's pretty dope.

So she does have to learn about being human now. Which was kinda what the Picoult storyline was about. Kinda.

Anyway, Gail Simone can take this development and run with it. I'm looking forward to it.

But back to this issue, there was some really fun battle banter:

There were actually pages of Wonder Woman dishing out the good banter. That's nice to see.

Also, look at this cozy Batman/Wonder Woman panel:

Man. I don't usually want those two to kiss, but I kinda wouldn't mind it. Look at how cute!

There was also a nice back-up story, also written by Heinberg, and drawn by Gary Frank. It was also really good:

Those are some really great facial expressions. I'm interested to see him upcoming run on Action Comics.

Holy smokes, am I done?! For real? Awesome, now I'm gonna work on my accounting assignment!

This Week's Haul: The Sexiest Week Ever

So many Batmans this week. Adorable Batman. Horny Batman. Retro Dickweed Batman. Loving Father Figure Batman. Grumpy Wedding Invite Decliner Batman.

There were other characters too. But mostly Batman.

It's a sexy week for comics all around. Let's have a look:

Catwoman #71

Rachelle cannot come to the phone right now because she has MELTED INTO A PUDDLE OF GOO after reading this comic.

Behold Batman holding Helena:

Ok, I try not to be, like, a girl, but I just really lose it over Batman and Catwoman. I want them to be together forever.

And then...Selina asks Bruce to help her "kill" herself and her daughter so bad guys will stop going after her. So they come up with this crazy scenario where Bruce dresses up like a crazed suicide bomber:

He blows the three of them up, or so it seems, and Catwoman is free to start a new life. Which we'll see starting in the next issue, but I assume involves the Outsiders. I hope it involves Bruce Wayne, but that's me being a girl again. She's the only woman I'll accept as Batman's lady...except me.

Superman/Batman #40

Bitch, you best back off.

I do not know much about Bekka, other than:

a) she is Orion's wife and a New God;
b) she is a giant ho.

While I appreciated the amount of naked Batman in this issue, I did not appreciate Little Miss No-Pants pawing him:

Nor did I appreciate how into it Bruce was:

Oh what, Bruce? You've never seen a woman wearing nothing but a dish towel over her ass before?

She's such a skank. Look at how she prays:

Anyway, Miss Thang and Batman have to do something or other together. I was trying to focus on something other than wanting to smack Bekka down, but Batman was not helping:

What sorcery are you using on my poor Batman, witch?!

ARGH! DIE!

Birds of Prey #110

Huntress is awesome. And so is Tony Bedard.

Robin #166

And now a public service announcement from Robin:

The more you know, kids!

This whole page was very cute...Bruce has been all cranky about Tim wanting to join the school tennis team. Which, I gotta say, is pretty obnoxious of Bruce.
Good for you, Tim! Stand up to him!

Captain America #30

My monthly hit of my delicious Winter Soldier.

I love you, baby.

But wait! What's this?

He can be shut down just by saying a single word? Don't we wish all men could have that feature? Am I right, ladies? Holla!

Tony Stark is being all emo:

Tony, you have to do what makes you happy.

Meanwhile, Sharon's complicated life doesn't get any easier:

Cue soap opera music!

Oh, girl. You have to have Captain America's baby. It will be the most awesome baby.

And this complicated my life:

So sexy! And yet...Tony Stark! Argh! I'm so confused!

Big shocker ending on this comic! You should read it!

Countdown Week 32

I just really like that cover. Very cute.

We get to see Black Canary's Bachelorette party for the third time in this comic. But this time Piper and Trickster are there...trying to steal car keys so they can make a break for it. It's pretty fun.

And we get to see more of the party, including Wonder Woman being Captain Bring-Down:

I think it might be too late for those girls being exposed to sexist objectification, Wonder Woman. I mean, they have mirrors, right? (Zing!)

I do appreciate her effort, though.

The Green Arrow/Black Canary Wedding Special

I think that Judd Winick and Amanda Conner are a great match. They both have a goofy playfulness to what they do, so this ended up being pretty fun.

Plus, Judd Winick is a pretty big superhero friendships nerd, so I think he was the right man for the job for this.

I loved this dig at Connor:

Vegan food and slide shows! Oh man, slide shows! It's true. And I love that whole bottom panel of the party-clothes superheroes.

This scene between Wonder Woman and Superman was absolutely adorable:

So cute. Too bad he wasn't right about all that "no evil to be found" stuff. The wedding kinda had some problems.

I enjoyed all the Snapper Carr bashing in this:

I enjoyed this. I laughed out loud quite a few times. Amanda Conner was a great choice for the art because no one does cheesecake better than her. And there was a lotta sexy action in this.

And of course A BIG SHOCKER ENDING!

JLA/Hitman #1

This was fun! I was skeptical because I don't really enjoy Garth Ennis's cynicism toward superheroes, but I liked this. It was a fun 90s throwback, and I liked having a follow-up story to Hitman #34, which had Superman having a heart-to-heart with Tommy on a rooftop.

The highlight for me was definitely Batman chewing Kyle out for once working with Tommy, only to be interrupted by Superman entering the room:

Hilarious.

This was great. Looking forward to the next one.

Aquaman #56

I love this comic. It's fun, intelligent, great-looking, well-written and funny. So of course it's been canceled.

I'm miserable. I'm not kidding when I say that this was one of the comics that I looked most forward to every month.

I mean, just look at how great this page is!:

That's a fun page!

What I really like about Tad Williams' writing is that his characters have a very natural way of speaking. There's a lot of dialogue, and it's quippy, but not in a Bendis way. I have nothing against Bendis, but the dialogue sounds a lot more scripted in his comics. I mean, it's a comic book so you can expect some over-dramatic and clunky dialogue, but I thought the writing really stood out on this series. And the story was really exciting. I'm very sad that there is only one issue left. Boooooooo!

World War Hulk #4

We finally get to see Dr Strange, Iron Man, Mr Fantastic and Black Bolt fight each other in a gladiator arena. But we don't get to see enough of it, in my opinion. I was really looking forward to some crazy gladiator action. I guess I wouldn't have been satisfied with anything short of a major motion picture. (Oh, wouldn't that have been great? If WWHulk had just been leading up to a two hour movie of the four of them wailing on each other?).

It woulda looked a little something like this:

Reed is totally gonna smash Tony with that mace!

Good times.

Marvel Adventures: Avengers #16

Speaking of good times, this was awesome!!

Stark gets some battlesuits stolen from him, and the Avengers have to fight them.

Also, Hawkeye is there!

And Iron Man gets his pants melted off!

Aw, remember when the Avengers were fun?

Tales of the Sinestro Corps: Parallax

It's a good week for Kyle fans because you get a lot of him in this, and in JLA/Hitman.

And in this, he is super dreamy:

Man, it's a good week for hotness in my comics this week. Thanks, comics!

I enjoyed this. It was emotional and exciting and stuff.

And Kyle put his old outfit on!

It's one of those A-Hero-Battles-His-Evil-Self-Inside-His-Own-Mind comics, but that never really gets old, does it?

Superman Doomsday on DVD

Hoo boy.

Ok, this movie was flawed to say the very least. For one thing, it is way too dark and violent for kids (I lost count of the number of necks being snapped) and way too boring and lame for adults. It's just not a good movie. I'm not a fan of this story line in the comics, but this was infinitely worse. And that's too bad.

Also, it was very, very gay. And by 'gay,' I mean 'homoerotic.' And not in a good way. In the way that Lex Luthor makes a Superman clone specifically so he can take his frustrations out on him. He beats him around while wearing Kryptonite gloves and no shirt, yelling things like "Why did you leave me?!" Then he straddles him, leans in so their faces are an inch apart, and says, I swear to God, "Who's your daddy?" And I fell out of my chair. It's messed right up.

Again, not really for kids. Besides the parade of spinal snappings and Lex's sexual dysfunctions, there are scenes like, oh, I don't know, LEX SHOOTING MERCY IN THE FACE, POINT BLANK!

Cartoons are fun!